Trusting in God

I can remember being in church services when I was a young kid and when I saw people who seemed like they were so close to God, I wondered how they did that. How does a person get so close to God that he or she can trust and depend on Him as if He is the only one worth trusting? I didn't understand it but I knew that when I was younger, I eventually wanted to get to a point where I was such a person.

There used to be a time when I couldn't really identify with the stories of Abraham, Moses, David, Elijah and the many others in the bible who came to a place when they had to totally depend on God. It was more of a "hey, that's nice" sort of thing but I remember thinking that God just must have done more extraordinary things during the Old Testament times and I should just be happy with the invitation I received to God from Jesus death and resurrection. But sometimes, as I have found out, God only needs to open our eyes to what is really going on for us to see that He's at work all along.

In 2 Kings 6, the king of Aram was at war with Israel. His forces surrounded the city of Dothan, where Elisha the prophet was staying. Check out how a man's eyes were opened by God to see the true circumstances that were going on when he saw the city surrounded by Aram's forces:

When the servant of the man of God rose early in the morning and went out, behold, an army with horses and chariots was all around the city. And the servant said, “Alas, my master! What shall we do?” He said, “Do not be afraid, for those who are with us are more than those who are with them.” Then Elisha prayed and said, “O Lord, please open his eyes that he may see.” So the Lord opened the eyes of the young man, and he saw, and behold, the mountain was full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. 

- 2 Kings 6:15-17 (ESV)

God had to open the eyes of the servant so that he saw that he had no reason to fear because the Lord had supplied them with a defense that Aram's forces would not even come close to matching. It's an amazing story in the bible of how sometimes we just need God to open our eyes so that we can see things differently and truly have confidence in the Lord.

When I was diagnosed with End Stage Renal Failure in March 2012, it turned my world upside down. I was in a place where I had no choice but to depend on God. But that decision was not a hard one because years ago, He opened my eyes and all the times that I thought that my circumstances were mere good fortune, He proved to me that it was Him that made it so. This revelation blew me away and left me almost speechless. It was like having your life laid out in front of you and realizing how much different things would have been if only a minute detail were changed. He not only was there with my in my toughest hour, He had always been there. 

The last two years have been a interesting ride to say the least but God's hand has been with me every step of the way. First, when I went to the hospital in the middle of the night due to an agonizing headache, I was told that had I not showed up at that time, I (at the age of 32 then) was in danger of having a stroke at any time. My blood pressure reading was over 200 and my vision had started becoming distorted in the weeks leading up to that hospital visit. Even with my health going downhill in that last month leading up to my diagnosis, I kept charging forward until my body literally couldn't take anymore. The interesting thing is that my diagnosis was of such that I had a rare condition (IGA nephropathy - body attacking kidney) where I was in trouble regardless and my stress simply brought it on quicker.

That night changed my life for the better. What? How in the world could having a kidney disease be part of a better life? Especially when unless I get a kidney transplant or by a miraculous recovery, my very life is at hand? Because God from the very beginning allowed me to see how awesome He's been and is. I almost had a stroke, which means that I was very close to death. I am alive today and still have my faculties about me. If I had my condition 100 years ago, I would have been in big trouble but being born when I was, there was enough knowledge to where I am be on dialysis and still have a strong quality of life. Back in December 2011, I remember praying to God to help me with my stress and to put my in a place where I could rest and spend more time with my family. That is exactly what I have now with a life that is significantly less stressful, I get lots of rest and I spend a lot of time with my family. In July 2012, I made the bold move to not return to work and I haven't worked a day since March 2012. My wife quit her job a month earlier and is now on a career path she desires rather than one she has had to do to make money. And God has provided all along the way.

It's not that it has been easy. What my wife and I have gone through these past two years would break many marriages apart. But because my wife and I are committed to our love and to our union, those challenges only made us stronger. Because we are pretty private people, most people don't know half of what we've gotten through together. But by God's grace we have remained loyal, faithful and in love with one another no matter the circumstances. I thank God for my wife like crazy because I wouldn't be where I am today without her. She has been an amazing gift in my life and is the most amazing person I know. 

That kid who wanted to know what it was like to be close to God is the 35-year-old who is. My happiness and peace comes directly from Him and I trust Him. He has never let me down. I share this today because you may be going through a tough time right now. The circumstances in your life may be overwhelming. But I can testify that God is greater than our problems. I pray that He may open your eyes as well.

Thankful to be alive,

LandoRigs