Defending Stephen A. Smith

There is a lot of controversy surrounding Stephen A. Smith, who is one of the hosts of ESPN's First Take. On Friday's show, he was speaking on the recent news surrounding the two-game suspension of Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice. As part of his perspective, he talked about the need for there to be awareness regarding how certain behaviors may provoke domestic violence.

Instead of listening to what Smith was saying, many people immediately took what he said to mean that he was somehow condoning domestic violence or that his perspective of "provoking" meant that he felt that women who are victims of domestic violence are somehow deserving of it. Unfortunately, they were not listening to the point that he was trying to make. This seems to happen a lot when issues are addressed in the mainstream media. People get up in arms with wild emotion instead of really stopping and trying to understand what the other person is saying.

Smith repeatedly said that he did not condone domestic violence. I believe him. What he was alluding to is that sometimes domestic violence can be in response to domestic violence and there are situations can indeed can be prevented from escalating to a boiling point. This is actually true. The side of domestic violence stories that seldom are dealt with is the reality that sometimes the victim was once themselves the perpetrator of domestic violence and abuse. This is no way means that all the victims were once perpetrators, it just points out that some are.

Let me give you an example. One day, we hear about a man who commits an act of domestic violence on his wife. We condemn the act and rightfully so. But what we don't recognize and talk about is the fact that the man's wife constantly committed acts of domestic violence against her husband for years. She verbally, emotionally and physically abused her husband on a regular basis. Because the public only zeroes in on the man's act, nobody is addressing the woman's destructive behavior in this situation. She is viewed as being completely innocent. As a result, she will take these same destructive behaviors into her next relationship and the same situation will be more likely to repeat itself. This is a problem, especially for her own well being.

We have to look at this as a big picture and see all the possible elements at play here. Otherwise, destructive behaviors that need to be addressed will not be addressed. As I point these things out, please understand that this is no way condones ANY act of domestic violence. It is all wrong. But abuse of any kind from anybody, both male and female, is also wrong. And the public needs to stop acting as if it is only women who suffer this type of abuse because research would show that is not the case. The public perception is slanted towards believing domestic violence is solely a female victim epidemic. The truth is that it affects both genders significantly. Check out my recent post entitled THE OTHER SIDE OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.

It is very sad that Smith has to constantly explain and even apologize for his words when there was nothing wrong with what he said. Perhaps in the context of the Ray Rice story it was not the wisest move but he was not and is not condoning domestic violence. What he was pointing out is that there is a cause and effect. A person who constantly yells at and beats on their spouse may one day be on the receiving end of such abuse from the very person who was once the victim. It doesn't make it right and I don't believe it to be right, but it is likely to happen. Let's consider that.

There are plenty of times I disagree with Smith on his perspectives. He is very outspoken and strong about his opinions. But the criticism that has been sent his way has been, in my opinion, unfair. At the end of the day, he believes just like I believe, domestic violence is WRONG!

Just my two cents,

LandoRigs